


this nightmare can't be real

by idaate



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Gen, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-11
Updated: 2018-03-11
Packaged: 2019-03-29 16:57:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13931349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idaate/pseuds/idaate
Summary: “Ah, nightmares.” Haru clicks her tongue sympathetically. “Falling asleep is frightful when you know nightmares await, it really is, but that makes waking up all the more pleasant, don’t you think? The wave of relief that washes over you knowing such horrors are far from reality-”“No, you’ve got it wrong,” Akechi smiles. “The issue isn’t that the dreams are too scary. It's that they’re too kind, and that’s a cruelty far worse than a dream of a monster ripping you limb to limb.”-Haru and Akechi discuss the cruelty of dreams.





	this nightmare can't be real

“It’s no problem, really,” says Haru.

“But I wouldn’t want to impose-”

“It’s _no_ problem,” says Haru more firmly, eyes narrowing, _“really.”_

Akechi swallows, his hand rubbing at the back of his neck as he averts his gaze from Haru’s own scrutinizing one. “While I appreciate your kindness, Okumura-san, I do think insisting that I spend the night with you, in your apartment, just the two of us, is…”

He trails off pointedly, and Haru tilts her head to the side in mock confusion. “What is it, Akechi-kun?”

“Don’t you think that, ah.” He inhales. “Two teenagers sharing an apartment overnight is a bit, well.”

“Akechi-kun, _really._ ” Haru huffs and crosses her arms. “You’re not _that_ immature, are you? Really, now. And I would’ve thought that the second coming of the Detective Prince was above such petty and childish beliefs.”

Akechi chuckles. “You’ve got me,” he admits. “I just really don’t want to impose.”

“And I just really want you to know that it’s no problem at all,” says Haru, “because otherwise you know I wouldn’t have offered.”

“Would I?”

Haru clicks her tongue and pulls herself up to her full height, trying to look as imposing as she possibly can in their current circumstance. “Akechi Goro,” she says, “it is nearly midnight and I absolutely _insist_ that you spend the night at my apartment, as it is far from safe for you to be traveling alone to your apartment, especially since it’s a…” She pauses. “I apologize, I’m not sure exactly where you…?”

“It’s,” Akechi makes a vague hand gesture, “a walk, yes, but it’s not as if I’ve not made longer walks.”

“So just because you went through danger once, you should do it again?”

“You’re making it sound as if though I’m traversing through some sort of dangerous wasteland,” says Akechi.

“Just stay the night, for my own peace of mind.” Haru clasps her hands together. “Please…? I made some tiramisu earlier, you know, and it’s not as if though I can conquer it myself.”

Akechi hums. “‘Conquer’, huh?” he says, shaking his head. “That’s quite a dramatic term for eating dessert.”

“It’s quite a dramatic endeavor,” Haru huffs. “Now, come inside, won’t you?”

She unlocks the door to the apartment and swings it open, dipping her head forward as she murmurs a soft, “After you,” that makes Akechi chuckle and step inside himself. She walks in after him, locking the door to the sound of the rain pounding against the windows of the place.

Akechi had offered to drive her home as the night had drawn to a close at Leblanc and everyone else had trickled out in ones and twos, and she had accepted readily enough - not because she actually needed to be driven but because she had wanted to spend more time with the detective himself, especially considering the fact that they would be fighting for their lives together and they were still on...shakier terms.

But as she turns around and finds Akechi sitting himself upon her couch like he’s sitting on a bed of needles, she finds that she really doesn’t have any sort of topic that they could discuss together.

Akechi himself doesn’t seem to hold any sort topic in mind, and Haru slides off her shoes before opening her mouth, closing it, opening it again and saying, “I’ll go cut the tiramisu.”

“That’d be lovely.”

The tiramisu itself is nice enough, if Haru does say so herself - maybe moister than she would have liked, but Akechi doesn’t complain as his fork clinks quietly against his plate, and so she doesn’t say a thing.

“That was delicious,” says Akechi after neatly cleaning his plate. He moves to get up and put it in the sink, but Haru holds out a hand, stopping him.

“What sort of host lets her guest clean up his own messes?” says Haru, and Akechi hands the plate over to her, chuckling lightly.

The awkwardness between them is unbearable.

Haru lets out an embarrassingly loud yawn as she wipes her hands clean on a towel. Even though she can’t see him, Haru can feel Akechi’s gaze burning into her back. “You know,” he says, “you don’t have to stay awake for my sake. I promise you that I won’t rob you blind or pilfer through your belongings as you sleep.”

“Oh?” says Haru, laughing lightly as she turns around. “What a gentleman. And here I thought chivalry was dead.”

“What can I say?” Akechi shrugs, hands spread to the side.

“There are some spare clothes in the closet over there,” Haru indicates with a nod of her head. “When you find that you’re ready to sleep, please, help yourself to what you need.”

“Right,” says Akechi with a thin smile. “Thank you, Okumura-san.”

Haru smiles and begins to walk over her room, her mind running through the options to try and see if there’s anything she’s missed, but finds nothing. “Well, then, goodnight, Akechi-kun!” she calls from the threshold of her bedroom.

“Goodnight!” Akechi calls back.

She closes the door.

-

Haru awakes with a gasp, sweat pouring down her face and her blankets wrapped around her like a cocoon as she grasps at them like a dying man. It takes a while for everything to sink in - the whir of her ceiling fan, the sensation of the cloth on her skin, her own panicked gasps as her chest heaves up and down - but once it does, she’s comforted with the reality that her dream was just a dream.

Nonetheless, it takes a moment for her to pull herself back up, her heart hammering against her chest as she recalls the utter terror of her dream, the feel of her axe hanging heavy in her hands as she heaves it into her father’s skull again and again and again.

She closes her eyes. She breathes out.

It takes a moment for her to steady herself enough to move out of her bed, her bare feet touching against the floor and making her shudder with the cold sensation before she breathes out and tries to find her slippers on the floor. She puts them on soon enough, pulling them on almost absentmindedly. She isn’t exactly sure what she intends to do, per se, but staying in her room for a moment longer feels...suffocating.

She needs to get out.

The seams of her bedroom door creak soundlessly as she swings it open, and the whole of her apartment is laid out in front of her. Including, as it so happens, Goro Akechi, sitting right where she left him - with his back turned to her as he sits on the couch, arms crossed and his head turned upwards as he seems lost in thought.

“Can’t sleep?” says Haru, and for an instant, Akechi becomes all sharp edges as he tenses up, breath escaping from him in a quiet wheeze. But that instant is over soon enough and Haru finds the boy turning towards her with a smile upon his face, a gloved hand tapping on his knee.

“Did I wake you?” he asks. “My apologies. I hadn’t intended to do so.”

“Mm, it’s fine, it wasn’t you,” says Haru, taking a seat besides him. “I couldn’t catch much sleep myself. If anything, it’s nice to see that you’re here. For company.” She smiles, and Akechi matches said smile.

“I’m touched you consider my presence such a pleasant one.”

“But of course!” Haru gestures with a single hand, motioning between them. “We’re teammates, after all! The _Phantom_ _Thieves_ \- isn’t that such a cool sounding name?” She allows herself to let out a giggle. “I personally think it is.”

“Indeed, it does have a certain charm to it,” says Akechi. “But it’s a team that I’m seeing to being disbanded myself.”

Haru bites her lip. “You’re not false,” she admits. “But maybe let’s - let’s change the topic. You couldn’t sleep, could you? That’s why you’re here, at this hour?” Akechi is still for a moment and then nods. “Then, if you’re alright with my asking, why…?”

“You know how it is,” says Akechi. “Dream trouble.”

“Ah, nightmares.” Haru clicks her tongue sympathetically. “Falling asleep is frightful when you know nightmares await, it really is, but that makes waking up all the more pleasant, don’t you think? The wave of relief that washes over you knowing such horrors are far from reality-”

“No, you’ve got it wrong,” Akechi smiles. “The issue isn’t that the dreams are too scary. It's that they’re too kind, and that’s a cruelty far worse than a dream of a monster ripping you limb to limb.”

Haru pauses at that.

“Not that nightmares aren’t already fairly unpleasant, of course,” says Akechi hurriedly. “Were nightmares your reason for staying up tonight? I do hope that they weren’t too terrible.”

“Ah-” Haru cradles her cheekbone in her palm, humming. “Well...they weren’t dreams I’d hold in fondness, no. You look at the news. You commented on it, I think, actually, in one of your talk shows…? Perhaps more than one?” Akechi’s expression is still quizzical, and she laughs lightly. “My father’s death.”

“Oh. That.”

“Mm.” Haru looks at her hands, opening and closing her fists before humming in quiet frustration and standing up. “I’ll- I’ll make us some tea, if that’s alright. Or actually, maybe some coffee would be good. I’m- I’m thinking about opening my own little chain of coffee shops, you know.”

“I wasn’t aware,” says Akechi. “Though, something caffeine free, if you’re hoping on getting back to sleep tonight.”

“Of course.” Haru steps over to the kitchen and prepares the coffee. Despite the fact that it’s late (or early, technically) and she’s just woken up and it’s dark save for the glow that the city lights offers through the window, she accomplishes her task with little difficulty, pouring it into mismatched mugs. The taller one she hands to Akechi, who takes it with a nod, while she keeps the other for herself.

She sits herself back down next to him and they nurse their cups for a while, Haru taking small controlled sips and Akechi taking none. The silence between them is palpable, and for not the first time, Haru wishes that she possessed the same charismatic nature of Akira, if only to be able to hold any sort of serious or painful conversation with ease and grace.

She inhales. “It’s just…” Haru moves her hands around almost aimlessly, hyper aware of Akechi’s gaze on her. She picks at the handle of her cup before leaning down and taking a sip, letting the heat warm her face. “I know you never knew your father, and his lack of presence might very well mark him as a bad person, but…can you _imagine_ killing your father? Can you?”

She looks at Akechi over through the corner of her eye. He swallows, his Adam’s apple bobbing, and doesn’t respond.

Haru lets out a sigh and picks up her coffee finally, cradling the cup with both her hands before exhaling and placing it down. “I’m sorry,” she says, “here I was hoping to cheer you up a bit and look where I got, talking only about myself and asking you uncomfortable questions. I wouldn’t call that a kind thing to do in the slightest. My sincerest apologies.”

“Oh no, no.” Akechi waves a hand. “The talking is- It’s nice.”

Haru offers him a small smile. “I’m glad, then,” she says. “Hey...Akechi-kun?”

“Mm?”

“Do you consider the world you’re living in,” she tilts her head, “your _reality_...to be so painful that waking up is something you’d rather _not_ do?”

She’s afraid she’s pried too far or said too much as Akechi leans forward with a hum, eyes half-lidded as he strokes his chin. “Yes,” he says finally, and Haru inhales quietly. He turns to face her, a touch of genuine confusion in his eyes. “Can’t you say the same, though? It’s not as if fate has been kind to you, or- or any of the other Phantom Thieves. Your father is dead, and chances are, you’re going to still be married off to that awful fiancé of yours. You can’t _seriously_ think that this is a nice ‘reality’ to wake up to, can you?”

Haru ducks her head down, her hair falling gently around her face, a barrier between her and him. “Those things are all true,” she says, “but...there are other things in my life that are also true. That are kind.”

Akechi leans back into the couch now, a frown seated upon his lips. “Really,” he says, sarcasm dripping as he closes his eyes. “Pray tell, what?”

“L-like friends!” Haru says immediately, leaning forward and grasping Akechi’s hand with such ferocity that it makes his eyes shoot open in alarm. “The Phantom Thieves- even if you’re requiring that we disband, we’ve still gone through so much together, you know? We’re friends, through and through, and we’ve gone through thick and thin together!” She nods firmly to herself, and Akechi continues to stare at her in gentle bizarre amazement. “I-I know that sounds dumb and cliche, but- but- I truly love the thieves with all my heart, I do! And I know they care about me, too, so… So…”

She trails off, letting go of Akechi’s hands. They remain frozen in the clawed grip that Haru had forced them to form as she had grasped them, fingers pushing out crookedly at awkward angles, like the claw of a broken toy. She’s tempted to reach out and pry the fingers back down, one by one, if only so they could stop making that awful shape.

But she doesn’t.

“Okumura-san,” says Akechi, “do you...consider me a friend?”

“I do!” she gasps, nodding ferociously. “I-I do, if...that’s alright with you, of course!”

“Even after all I’ve done, slandering you all on live television and making the world hate you?” says Akechi. “Even knowing that I am the reason that your friend group will be forced to halt its activities, the very thing that brought you so close together? You don’t resent me at all for that?”

Haru bites her lip. “Well…” she says, “I would most certainly be lying if the things you were doing didn’t frustrate me, but...what would be achieved if I did? Far less fruitful things than could be achieved by keeping myself angry and holding grudges till I die. Plus, well.” She smiles. “Hating people is...so tiresome, don’t you think?”

Akechi’s frown deepens, but at least his awful clawed hand grows slack. “I don’t suppose I’ve ever thought of hating people as something ‘tiresome’, but now that you phrase it like that...I can’t really say that you’re wrong.” He shrugs. “Well- I shouldn’t really try and wiggle my way into trying to give you reasons to hate me or whatever. The fact that you consider me a friend is really a high honor.” The frown finally slackens as well, a gentle smile gracing his face instead. “Thank you.”

“Ah, little old me?” Haru giggles, trying to lighten the mood a touch. “I’m sure you have far many more friends than me in far more lofty and interesting positions than,” she wiggles her fingers into air quotes, “the daughter of a deceased and corrupt businessman, you know?”

Akechi’s smile grows a bit more strained at that. “You don’t need to denounce your father for my sake, really,” he says. “But no, honestly speaking? I do believe you’re the first person in...as long as I can remember that’s bestowed the title of ‘friend’ on me.” He mimics Haru’s little finger wiggle from beforehand. “And isn’t that lofty enough for you?”

Haru eyes Akechi. “That’s sad, Akechi-kun.”

Akechi spreads his hands to the side. “We’re part of a pretty sad band of thieves,” he says. “I’m just fitting in.”

Haru sighs deeper and nearly grasps his hands again before remembering that claw shape and thinking better of it. “There are better ways to fit in,” she says. “Maybe...once this whole mess with Sae-san is over, we could hang out…? And watch a movie. Something stress free and fun!” She punctuates the last several words with a small jazz wave, and as Akechi smiles, Haru can’t help but feel a small rush of pride at the fact that she put that smile there herself.

“Yes,” says Akechi, and something in his voice strikes Haru as a touch forlorn, “when this whole mess is over, I’d really enjoy that. If you’re still willing, of course.”

“Of course!” says Haru. “I don’t see why I wouldn’t be!”

Akechi’s smile grows just a touch sadder and Haru hurriedly adds, “I just- I really want to make this a world that you won’t feel disappointed to wake up in anymore, Akechi-kun.”

Akechi blinks. “That’s waxing things a bit poetically, don’t you think?”

“Well, it’s true,” says Haru, “waxed or not.” She nods firmly to herself as she stands up, empty mug in hand. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I do feel quite tired myself, so I’m going to attempt to catch a few more hours of sleep while I’m still able. I’d recommend that you do the same, if you can work yourself up to it.”

Akechi clicks his tongue. “We’ll see,” he says simply.

Haru nods. “Well then,” she says, gentler, “I’ll see you in the morning, then?”

“Mm.” He’s not looking at her.

She figures that’s as much of a response as she’ll get at this point and turns to make her way back to her bedroom. She’s fairly confident that she won’t have any nightmares for the rest of the night.

And she doesn’t, and when she awakes, she finds Akechi with his arms crossed as he sits where she left him on the couch, head nodding gently as he breathes in and out. Haru drapes a blanket over him as delicately as she can and prepares them both coffee - caffeinated, this time - and hopes that when Akechi awakes to the smell, he won’t be disappointed.


End file.
